Ain’t No Friggin’ Test

You all have been turned from a mass audience of Phil Donahue to a mass audience of Jerry Springer… ding! ding! ding!

I’ll bet dollars to donuts Ted Kennedy received a phone call the moment he hit the ground doing the Worm Dance. Can you say Manchurian Candidate?

How do you like them apples Ted? Shut me up will you when I try to expose the lies about the OJ Simpson, Scott Peterson, my own kid sister murders and a host of other dastardly deeds. Excused it away as "some must be sacrificed for the sake of the nation" & "national security" huh? – Is turn around fair play Ted?

Ted can’t hear me right now. He’s sedated to the point of near comatose to keep him from committing suicide rather than to continue to live with a most severe case of chronic Tinnitus (ringing noises in the head).
                             He must not have heard the old adage: You lie with dogs and you get   
                             flEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEz.

Honestly Ted it pains me to see you suffer. And I’m a merciful person, really I am. But since you taped my mouth shut, best I can now do is send this curative message in a bottle and cast it amongst the public sea. So somebody out there, PLEASE, for mercy’s sake get Ted to ingest 1/20^th oz troy of pure gold dust garunteed to cure what ails you. -"What we have here is failure to communicate… I don’t like it any more than he does."

And the rest of you DTMFers shouldn’t gloat at Ted’s predicament. You’re all going to need a RE: EDucated sympathetic voice such as he will be if you are to have any chance of averting a world wide cataclysm of literally Biblical proportions, BECAUSE…

Hear Oh Israel; The Oil Your God, The Oil Is OnE

   When the price of gas here in Manhattan reaches over $6.50/gal, the powers that be, in a last ditch effort to maintain control, will allow these mind control devices to increase in intensity to the point of Critical Mass. They don’t really care if this effort fails them. And like Saddam Hussein, if they can’t have their power base they’d rather see it burn up then let anybody else have what they think is theirs. Their Pavlovian jinns will not ignore the open command prompt protocol THX 1138. And there is a Pacific Ocean of red tape insuring this prompt stays open. To these jinns it’s S.E.P. And yall are the somebody-elses.

If there is not an ingestion of a dose of gold among the population at large before Manhattan gas prices hit $6.63/gal: The host of heaven, popcorn in hand, will be screening a re-issue of the movie ZULU in full screen Technicolor™ bloodbath.    ding! ding! ding!

SignEd of Jonah